Bareback Fun Day

   Today ended up being a great day with Phoenix and I definitely learned a lot.  I made a few mistakes, but I learned from them and know better now.  The horses were put away and my girl was in her stall when I got there, so I grabbed her bridle (English with full cheek snaffle) and let myself into her stall.

   Phoenix took the bit super easy and I led her out to the arena and hopped on bareback.  It was a little windy today, so my girl started out a little on edge, but she settled and we worked out like normal.  

   Phoenix did great during walk and trot exercises, but she was a little bit of a butt when I first asked her to canter.  I started out asking for the left lead (our bad side) and Phoenix did not want to pick up the canter at all.  I put leg pressure on her, kicked her, and had to hit her in the butt for her to finally pick up a canter.  It took awhile to get her to pick up the correct lead, but once she did, I let her canter around the arena a few laps before switching directions.  

   Phoenix did a great lead change to the right and we cantered some more on our good lead before I walked her around for a little bit and started walking the barrel pattern.  

   Phoenix took the pattern good at a walk and we had a few trouble spots at the trot, but overall it went good.  The lope is where we struggle most when we come out of turns (mostly our left turn).  Phoenix and I broke down the pattern a few times and took the pattern at a slower lope and then ran it a little more like a race.  We have a long way to go till we are pulling times under 20 but she is definitely improving and bracing less on her turns.  

   I decided to call it quits on barrels after that because I have a habit of over working/over thinking turns which benefits no one.  So I walked Phoenix around for a little bit and then headed to the back arena behind the horse pastures where I pulled a log out to mess around with jumping for fun.  

   I hopped off and walked my girl over the log a few times to make sure she was comfortable with it because it has been awhile since we have taken any sort of jump and then I mounted back up.  

   I walked Phoenix over the little jump from both directions a few times and then we took it at a trot.  Phoenix (as usual) got a little excited/pushy when we started taking the jump faster than a walk.  She took the bit and I had to circle her to a stop a few times and correct her, making her work on her walk and stop for a little bit.  

   I let Phoenix take the jump at the canter a few times and then we worked taking it at a controlled walk and then trot while my arms were out.  I was super nervous at first, but Phoenix listened and pulled up when I re-grabbed the reins after the jump.  It felt good to kind of push the boundaries and really trust my girl.  I'm super proud of her for working hard to please me today and even though we didn't have the best of results at everything we worked on, it was a good day.

   I walked my girl around for a few minutes to cool her down and then I went to have her back up over the jump before I put her away.  If Phoenix hates anything, its backing up.  She always fights going backwards and when she listens, she only takes a few steps before its forward motion again.  I used a lot of leg and urged her back with some bit pressure, but she just kept fighting me.  

   Since Phoenix wasn't budging, I hopped off and was tempted to just stop asking her and put her up.  I know once you start something with your horse, you need to finish it, otherwise they will get the idea that they can get away with whatever they did and continue doing it.  Well I didn't give up just yet, but I let my stress and frustration get to me and what I ended up doing was wrong and could've ended badly for me and my horse.  

   I tried backing Phoenix over the jump on the ground for a few minutes, but she wouldn't move an inch and kept fighting me, so I just let her go.  Being a good horse, Phoenix started following me,  but I was so fed up with her, that I just shooed her away until she cantered off down the ranch.  This was when I started crying and then realized that I shouldn't have done that.  I felt stupid and I ran down towards the barn aisle where Phoenix had stopped running to eat the hay off the floor.  

   As I was walking up to my girl, I noticed the she had stepped through her reins (luckily they were longer ones) and it scared me to death because I knew if Phoenix started running again, she could seriously injure herself.  This was when I knew that what I had done had been wrong and I shouldn't take out my frustrations on my girl who wasn't even to blame.  It was my fault for not listening to her and for just giving up.  

   I got Phoenix to lift up her hoof and I pulled the reins out from under her and back over her head.  I gave my girl lots of scratches and hugs and I apologized to her for being so ignorant and stupid.  Knowing I had to get back on her so we didn't end on that note, I re-mounted my girl and walked her around for a few minutes.  

   Then I led her back to the tack room where I dismounted and tied her up real quick so I could grab her halter and slip it on.  I gave my girl another giant hug and a handful of grain due to feeling terrible about letting her loose with her bridle.  It was the stuppidest mistake I had ever made and I could've injured my girl or lost her.  I need to stop working on jumping because it always pushes me past the breaking point and I need to listen to my girl and try things other ways if she isn't responding instead of get mad or give up.  

   Some people might think I'm unlucky because I have a green horse (not too green anymore though but definitely not seasoned) and not a lot of riding years under my belt, but I'm quickly learning that growing with your horse and training yourself is the best way to go.  I have learned so much about riding due to making mistakes and having to teach my horse how to take barrels or jumps.  If I hadn't had to learn with my girl, I might not be improving as a rider because a lot of times, experienced horses do everything you ask no matter how you are riding.  

   I am thankful everyday that I ended up with my crazy girl and I can't believe I took that for granted and put my girl at risk today.  I've learned from my mistake and after giving myself a heart attack and realizing that I can't let myself get to that point again, I know I need to move on and continue working with my girl.  

   I know all of the crazy stunts she pulls is helping me to become one heck of a rider and I will be grateful when I am older that I didn't have a been-there-done-that horse that let me get away with everything.  This girl has potential and if I work on working with her instead of against her at times, I know we have a shot at High School Rodeo this season.